What A Girl Is Really Thinking When It Comes To Food

Category Archives: Mexican

Mayahuel  [Click the photo above to go to  Mayahuel’s website]

 340 East 6th Street (between 1st and 2nd Avenue), New York, NY 10003

 Thirsty Thursday! I had dinner plans at Mayahuel last night. Resies (reservations) were at 9:30 so that meant I could squeeze the gym in, woohoo! KILLED IT, but I have a little cough, so I had to retire after my cough went a little wacky on the bike. Peace gymmy.

 Ordered 2 miso soups (30 cals eachhhhh) and some sushi pieces so I wasn’t cray cray before drinks. 9:30, pshh, a snack/dinner was inevitable.

 Emailed myself the address to Mayahuel and then I hit the road. The restaurant is a weird black building with some sort of Spanish architecture so I figured that was the place.

 I told the taxi driver the address and when he pulled up he said “yeah I think that’s it. It’s a bar.”

 I actually really liked him. We talked about the weather…but he was eating the WORST smelling sandwich. Sir, c’mon. Turkey. Go with turkey next time.

 Some weird bouncer/skinny man is standing outside and I asked him, “what is the name of this place?”


“Oh ok great”

“Do you have a reservation?”

“I’m not sure. I think so I think it’s under my friend’s name.” I then give his name.

“Oh, ok just let me see your ID” (makes me feel young again)

 When I walk in my friend is wearing a leather jacket so thank G-d I last minute vetoed mine otherwise we would have looked like Grease Lightning up in this joint. One leather jacket is fine…two is a statement.

 Menu looks like a small book from Colonial times, so I was a little overwhelmed. We decided to just ask the waiter what he recommended. And he was a ridiculous human if I’ve ever seen one. He looked like he was trying too hard to be casual, like ”I’m not really your waiter, but I’ll take your order” sorta deal…shaggy hair, a cartilage piercing (im sorry what? this isn’t in the 90s…where is your hemp necklace?) and he gave crazy descriptions of the drinks…stop playing with your hair and recommend a drink dude.

 I ordered the “hit or miss,” and I swear I originally thought the waiter was saying the “hit or miss” was either a hit or a miss…and I was just like why the eff would I want a drink that’s usually a hit or a miss? It ended up being really good…I had 3. That’s completely reasonable right? They were spicy, which I always give a fab rating for.

 “You have a great smile.” GUILTY AS CHARGED.

 “Should we order something? You do have a food blog.” (this blog is really working out)

 Ordered the fried stuffed plantains. There were 6 (in my head of course: so three for me and three for him. That’s reasonable. G-d forbid I ate four and he ate two. Blasphemy.)

 YUM! Tried to eat like a lady, but I might have finished my portion before him.

 “I read your blog.”

“You did? Did you think it was funny? Did you laugh out loud? Too girly?” (I am completely secure with my writing style)

“I read the Employees Only one.”

“Oh, because you were in it?”

 Yep, let’s talk about how I portrayed you in my blog. I don’t feel weird at all about it. How can I type a story for the blog if all I talk about is the blog? I’m gonna talk about the process of me writing the blog on the blog…that’s boring.

 A few drinks in and nature was calling. As I got up to use the restroom I knocked into our table and the people next to us stared at me…they actually stared at us the entire meal, and I really wanted to just be like, “MIND YA BUSINESS” (instead I pretended it wasn’t a big deal that I wasn’t skinny enough to fit between the tables and sauntered to the bano.)

I got back from the bathroom at the perfect time…it was time for dessert. CHURROS…o’lay. Fried dough, cinnamon, in a chocolate and caramel dipping sauce. HOW DISGUSTING? NOT.

The cinnamon was starting to aggravate my cough, and I kept digging into my bag like an 85 year old woman for cough drops.

 “Are you sick?”

Nope, just a weirdo who digs for candy between sips of alcohol and bites of food.

Time to leave before my cough causes the restaurant to be quarantined.

 “Do you want to walk?”

UH…I wore some sort of a heel, and my hair doesn’t just dry like this, it’s also misting out. Are.you.kidding?

 “We’re like 30 blocks away…” (ok 20 whose counting)

 “I like to walk.”


 “Ok, lets hail a cab”

Mayahuel (fried plantains stuffed with cheese)

I didn’t think I’d love this as much as I did. savory sweet combo, and then I dipped it in the spicy sauce…unreal.

Mayahuel (churros in a chocolate and caramel sauce)

DELICIOUS. Sugary dessert probably doesn’t go amaze with a spicy drink, but I mean you can suck it up.

Mayahuel (“hit or miss” is the one closest to the front, and I forgot the other one…sorry!)

YUMMY. I’ll say it once, I’ll say it twice, spicy drinks are the best!

Caliente Cab [Click the photo above to go to Caliente Cab’s website]

 488 3rd Avenue (on the corner of 33rd Street), New York, NY 10016

I planned to go to dinner with two friends at Yuca Bar, for their Loco Tuesday special…half off all tapas wooooohhh. It seemed so easy at first! I had been salivating at pictures of their dishes for days…it was like food porn.

 But Friend # 1 is some sort of social worker that works with foster children (vomit..kidding), and she had to cover for someone who is away in Nigeria last minute SO we couldn’t go at 6:30 to make this Loco Tuesday special and all hell broke loose, because rescheduling was just not an option, and we’re girls, so I mean how easy could we possibly be? WE WILL FIGURE THIS OUT!

 It was more stressful than going on a date with a boy. Going out with newish girl friends is so hard. You don’t want to be too difficult, you want to make sure everyone’s happy, you don’t want to be too bossy, bc you’re not good enough friends yet to let your(my) freak flag fly.

 Typing a text, deleting a text, do I send an emoticon?? IDK!

 I spent the last hour of work yelping, googling, gchatting, texting trying to figure this out (whatever).  I can’t go any other time this week unless we go on the weekend, and it’s St Patrick’s Day on Saturday so it doesn’t really work etc etc etc.

 “How about here?”

“Do they take reservations?”

“I don’t know about the menu.”

“Is it hh??”

“What is hh?”


“Maybe I can get out earlier.”

“I want to cry.”

“I am filled with emotions.” (that was me)

 So everyone is scrambling left and right to pick a time. Friend 2 gets out at 5. I get out at 5:30. Who knows when Miss Fostercare gets out (Friend 1 has now been renamed). The Loco Tuesday only goes until 8.  Fostercare has to park her car, but it’s hard to park downtown. Lets go more local. A;lfkjaslfjsfl;kj

 So I’m frantically trying to find an outdoor space (b/c it was SO nice out), but there aren’t THAT many spots with outdoor seating, good food, and alcoholic beverages.

 “Rio Grande?”


 Ummmmm I’m drawing a blank here.

 I know this place called The Cannibal has outdoor seating and beer, but Fostercare is a vegetarian and they specialize in unusual meats…great, think harder!

 I call The Cannibal to see if they can  work around a vegetarian and they say fine, but turns out Friend # 2 doesn’t really want to eat there.

 So Friend #2 meets me after work, and we walk to my apartment to turn ourselves into human specimens as opposed to what one looks like when they leave work at the end of the day (at my apt I was like “what do you want to watch? Do you like this show? I can change it…Who am I? Being so accomidating?) And then we walk to the Cannibal to look at the menu, while Fostercare parks. As we know, I will eat just about anything, but I don’t want to pick a place no one likes etc etc. so Friend #2 doesn’t want to go there (I get it. They serve pig’s ear as a dish…I’ve tried it before though…judge away) so we start aimlessly walking around the city.

 “How about here?”


“I’m fine with anything.” (my neutral response to every place, because honestly I’ll eat anywhere as long it looks worth the money. Thank G-d I had an iced coffee otherwise my hunger would have overridden any form of social etiquette or sanity).

 On the walk to my apt, Friend #2 walked by Caliente Cab and said, “oooh that place looks cute,” and it’s Mexican which goes sort of with the Yuca Bar theme in that they both serve quesadillas, and you can sit outside.

 So we decide to go there. Is it amazing fair? No, but there’s outdoor seating, margaritas and guacamole, and I don’t have to take public transportation (yeah, right) or a cab. Fine.

 Waiter walks by..

 “Can we get an order of guacamole?”

“Mild, medium or spicy?”

 Ah, decision to be made.

 I like spicy (picante), but it’s rude to order dishes with extra heat if other people can’t eat them, so I wait:

Friend #2: mild to medium

Fostercare: medium

Me: We’ll have medium.

Friend #2: what did you want? (busted for being too agreeable!)

Me: well, I like spicy, but I can still eat medium or mild. Some people just can’t eat that. (should I have lied?)

 After 2 margaritas I felt a little better.

 AND WHEN I GOT HOME…MY NEW SNEAKERS HAD BEEN DELIVERED WHAT WHAT!  Caliente Cab ended up being the best choice for the night (outdoors with alcohol, food was meh) but I still want to go to Loco Tuesday for some legit food 😦

Caliente Cab (tacos al carbon)

For under $10 it’s hard to complain.

Caliente Cab (quesadilla: vegetales frescos)

I didn’t try them, but it looks pretty good. The vegetarian ordered this. It is surprisingly easy to order dishes without any meat at a Mexican restaurant (if you ever go with a vegetarian or a vegetarian yourself).

Caliente Cab (healthy burrito)

Here is my disharoo. It tasted healthy, so you be the judge of that statement. I didn’t feel guilty for eating it, but it needed a little something, maybe more beans.

Caliente Cab (guacamole)

Hard to mess up gauc, but they brought the guac without chips at first…you have two hands…bring the chips.

Caliente Cab (strawberry margarita)

A little syrupy, and the waiter was kind of sucky in that he took forever to bring us a second round, and oh yeah, he brought me the wrong margarita.

I get it was crowded, but no.

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