What A Girl Is Really Thinking When It Comes To Food

Category Archives: Jewish

Lattanzi [Click the photo above to go to Lattanzi’s website]

361 West 46th Street (between 8th and 9th avenue) New York, NY 10036

The best thing about going to a Broadway show is the dinner before the show, at least in my book.

I’m not a theatre girl, never have been, never will be. I hate fighting over the arm rest with strangers (or my sister), I hate the line for the bathroom at intermission, I hate the slow sad songs, and over animated theatre people weird me out. So, I was not excited to sit in an itchy chair and see “Once” to say the least. (I I know it won a million Tony’s, but they don’t even do a Fashion Police segment on it so please, it’s not a real show) I went because my mom wanted a girls’ night with my sister and me.

I spent my Friday nursing a hangover, and trying to pump myself up for this show. I shoveled in a bacon egg and cheese, and listened to Bernadette Peters sing “Broadway Baby” on YouTube (yes, this is really how I spent my Friday at work).

Dinner was at Lattanzi on Restaurant Row (Italian restaurant with a Jewish twist).

Lets be real, there was no way I was taking any form of public transportation with a day-long hangover, so I hopped in a cab and let it be my nap time.

I got there rather quickly considering I had to get across town at 6pm on a Friday.

“Left or right side?” The cab driver asked.

“Um, whatever side is good.” (I had no idea where I was going)

I find the restaurant after a few wrong turns (I’m an idiot), and my mom and sister arrive shortly after.

The bread basket is placed in front us, and I could not have dug in faster.

“Can I get you anything to drink?”

Do I drink to help the hangover, or do I get something caffeinated so I wake up? ALCOHOL.

“Can I see your wine list?”

The waiter hands me the wine list, and I realize I know nothing about wine.

Without even opening up the menu I just ask, “What’s your lightest red wine by the glass?”

I don’t even hear his reply, “I’ll have that.”

My sister gets wine, and my mom gets a club soda (boo).

I see the menu has an artichoke appetizer, “Jewish style.” I had no idea there was Jewish way to cook artichokes, but my mom thinks it’s just the funniest, and orders them. I get a house salad, because I’m about to choke down black pasta with seafood as my main, so better to save my appetite.

My sister gets a caprese salad, and rolled pasta. My mom wants the same dish as me, but she’s allergic to tomatoes (every meal she tells the waiter, “I’m HIGHLY allergic to tomatoes.” She breaks out in hives. It’s annoying, but sometimes really funny to watch her freak out).

Since the black pasta comes with tomato sauce, it makes sense for her to order something else, so she begrudgingly orders the veal. I weirdly do not have one of those moms that tells me to order the fish.

“I miss tomatoes.” (she acquired the allergy with age)

“We know mom!”

Appetizers come, and we quickly distribute little bites to each other of our dishes.

“What’s this play about anyway.”

“I don’t know.”

“I don’t know.”

I whip out my phone and look up a brief description of the play.

“The mozzarella cheese is melted. Yes!”

“Can we get pepper please?”

My house salad was just lettuce, but I ate it like my life depended on it. The mains arrive super fast.

“They must be used to having people run to the theatre afterwards,” says my mom.

“Makes sense.”

“Well, we have a lot of time, so let’s eat slowly,” (good one).

My spaghetti was sort of simple, but my mom’s veal was stuffed with cheese, and that was a great surprise. My sister had pasta with ricotta cheese and tomato sauce, so there was no way she wasn’t finishing that.

“I don’t even care. I drank last night, and my diet restarts tomorrow,” I announce.

Our plates are cleared, “do you want the dessert menu?”

DUH.

“Can I get a cappuccino with skim milk?” My sister asks. Yep, the skim milk will totally save you from what you just ate.

“We only have whole milk.”

“Ok, I’ll still get it.” (you can’t deter us)

Napoleon ordered as well.

I then forklift myself up and trek to the theatre. When we arrive, the cast is singing on stage while people are being seated.

“Theatre people are so weird.”

“I know.”

Lattanzi (Mozzarella E Pomodoro: homemade mozzarella and fresh tomato with extra virgin olive oil and basil)

Surprise surprise, they melted the cheese a bit! The tomatoes were plump and not too mushy, too bad my mom couldn’t have any of it.

Lattanzi (arciofi Alia Giudia our signature dish of artichokes cooked jewish style; sauteed with garlic and olive oil)

If you like artichokes it’s a great app. Enough said.

Lattanazi (Insalata Mista mixed greens with endive and radicchio in a house vinaigrette dressing)

Your basic house salad. I ate it to hold me over so I wouldn’t keep eating the bread basket.

Lattanzi (veal stuffed with cheese and a side of roasted vegetables)

This was a special so I don’t have the fancy pants title of this dish. However, I really liked it. Maybe it’s because I try to not eat red meat, so when I do it’s super exciting, but it was a solid dish.

Lattanzi (black spaghetti in a spicy tomato sauce with seafood)

I would have liked a little more heat to the dish, but if you have a sensitive palette this is a good dish to order.

Lattanzi (Rotolo Di Spinaci E Ricotta: homemade rolled pasta filled with ricotta cheese and spinach topped with tomato sauce)

If you’re going to splurge on a serious pasta dish, this is a good one to do it with. I’d say the portion is equivalent to two giantic pasta shells.

Lattanzi (napoleon)

So.good. I’m a sucker for napoleons, so it was a great way to end the meal.

I just want to apologize to my “many” followers aka my cousins and like 2 friends who read this for not posting that much lately. I’ve been trying to shrink my hips and butt for summer, and that means no eating out for extravagant 3 course meals. Weird, I know.

Instead of posting my incredibly entertaining stories, I have been posting links to food articles I like. As my cousin so nicely pointed out, “I can just look these articles up myself,” I am still posting another link.

I like to think of myself as your personal food filter for note worthy articles. (She also politely told me that I need to check out a map since I rarely take the subway or bus…deal with it)

So I promise to fatten up soon and go out to dinner, in the meanwhile [Click the photo above to read, What’s on Your NYC Bucket List?]


Kutsher’s [Click the photo above to go to Kutsher’s website]

186 Franklin Street, New York, NY 10013

My pops offered to take me out to din and I obliged. I usually pick a spot in my neighborhood, but it’s the Tribeca Film Festival baby, lets pretend we’re celebrities and hang in TriBeCa instead, duh!

Made a rezie at Kutshers at 7:30 on Thirsty Thursday. My dad was pickin’ me up so I had no fears of catching a cab or finding my way downtown…I have NO sense of direction.

He told me he would get me at 7, but that old man was early for the first time eva, and I had to run around like a chicken without a head, trying to find pants with some give in them. I found a pair of wide-leg jeans, and hopped in the elevator.

We were zipping along downtown, as I told my dad my thoughts on dieting, what I try not to eat, what I want to eat, what I can’t eat, where I should work out (“I just need to eat in moderation, that’s all,” said the food blogger).

“Or you could just get mono again and lose the weight,” my dad says as he navigates away from a cab.

…thanks Dad.

Everything was going fine and dandy until we hit Broome Street. GRID LOCK TRAFFIC. Nowhere to go. It was torture. All my great conversation pieces were being used up in the frontseat of the car.

“I’m starving!” my dad screams in the car (So that’s who I get it from).

Fortunately for us, there was a hotdog stand right outside our car. My dad pulls down his window, “Hey! Let me get a hotdog with sauerkraut and mustard.”

I had been preaching to him for the past 20 minutes the problems with our meat industry, because I am currently reading Skinny Bitch in the hopes I’ll become anorexic and not care about food, so I held back from ordering my very own hotdog (I had a bite).

“How ya gonna give up meat? It’s just too good,” my dad says as he takes down the hotdog.

We finally arrive at Kutshers, and we are seated at the modern Jewish eatery. What to get, what to get…

“Check out these cocktails!” My dad hits the menu to show me where to look. (he’s a big tapper when he talks… “you see the thing is…” tap tap tap)

If you went to Jew camp as my Dad and I did, you could appreciate a few: Bug Juice, Route 17, Café Canteen, The Anawana…you get the idea.

Ok, screw the drinks. I don’t need to waste my calories, what are we ordering??

We stare at the pair eating next to us, two guys with meat dishes (that sounds weird, sorry I thought it, you thought it, done). I peak over and immediately declare it’s the flanken short ribs. No doubt in my mind.

Appetizers….

“We gotta get the meatballs,” my dad says as his pointer underlines the description on the menu.

“Ok, Dad fine, but I want the potato latkes.”

The waiter suggest the charcuterie, but my dad is like hell to the no. I just kept saying, “I did hear they’re known for their char-coot-er-ie.”

We also got crispy artichokes, because why not?

Mains? Should we share? I’m pretending to be a vegetarian (remember when we ordered meatballs?), so I got the kreplach, which is pretty much ravioli, whoops, and OF COURSE my dad went for the short ribs: we’ll share. Oh, and brussels sprouts, we love brussel sprouts.

“You ever been on JDate,” my dad starts.

“No, Dad.”

“You know a lot of people on it?”

“I know people that are on it, and people that are not on it.”

“You dating anyone?” (hint hint hint hint)

Apps are yum, yeah I ate the meatballs, and they were good, so what.ev.er. The latkes were good, but not as good as my mom’s (are you reading this Mom?).

I’m starting to crack under this pressure. I need to contract mono and go on Jdate. Noted. Suddenly it’s just too much for me to bear…”It’s just so hard! I really didn’t picture myself at 25 (not 25 yet, a week away) at this job, in this apartment!”

“You just want a boyfriend.” THANKS DAD!

The waiter must have felt the pressure as well, because when he went to pick up the pitcher of water it slipped out of his hands and spilled everywhere. The kreplach was yummy with mushrooms and nuts. My dad put a small chunk of meat on my plate, as I ate the mashed potatoes directly off his plate.

“What’s your sister been up to? Who did she take to formal?”

“Show me a picture.”

“His hair was gel’d, it looks gray on Facebook.”

“Let me see.”

Dessert time. I wanted to get the ice cream sandwich, but the waiter steered us towards the chocolate cake…it was ok.

“Being sick sucks!” my dad exclaims to me. He just had strep throat, and if you spoke to him you’d think he was on his deathbed.

“You’re just being a guy.”

“I lost 5lbs from just eating soup and tea.” Ok, maybe you’re not being a guy.

We finish eating our 8 course meal…”how many people do you think are Jewish in here?” A good amount.

As he drives me back to my apt, he makes a wrong turn, and we end up going on a bridge to Brooklyn… “well, I don’t know the last time you were on the Manhattan Bridge, but you’re on it now,” he says. I see where my sense of direction comes from.

Kutsher’s (bread)

The bread was challah, and it was good! I’m down with this theme.

Kutsher’s (Milton short ribs and brisket meatballs)

Really yummy. It’s like a mini Jewish holiday meal.

Kutsher’s (potato latkes)

Solid. They don’t taste like my mama’s, but I’m still happy we got them.

Kutsher’s (pan roasted brussels sprouts)

We ordered too much, and didn’t really touch them, so leftova for me!

Kutsher’s (red wine braised flanken style short ribs)

Short ribs, mashed potatoes. It’s meat and potatoes. It’s what you think it is. It’s good and unhealthy.

Kutsher’s (wild mushroom and fresh ricotta kreplach)

So I ordered pasta, judge me. fine! Skinny bitch said it’s ok, sorta. I didn’t finish it, and I am sticking to it. 2 pieces of kreplach aren’t going straight to my ass (who am I trying to convince?)

Kutsher’s (seven layer’s devil food cake)

Cake was ok, I declared that they need a chocolate meltaway on the menu…you’re welcome for that suggestion.



%d bloggers like this: