Lattanzi [Click the photo above to go to Lattanzi’s website]
361 West 46th Street (between 8th and 9th avenue) New York, NY 10036
The best thing about going to a Broadway show is the dinner before the show, at least in my book.
I’m not a theatre girl, never have been, never will be. I hate fighting over the arm rest with strangers (or my sister), I hate the line for the bathroom at intermission, I hate the slow sad songs, and over animated theatre people weird me out. So, I was not excited to sit in an itchy chair and see “Once” to say the least. (I I know it won a million Tony’s, but they don’t even do a Fashion Police segment on it so please, it’s not a real show) I went because my mom wanted a girls’ night with my sister and me.
I spent my Friday nursing a hangover, and trying to pump myself up for this show. I shoveled in a bacon egg and cheese, and listened to Bernadette Peters sing “Broadway Baby” on YouTube (yes, this is really how I spent my Friday at work).
Dinner was at Lattanzi on Restaurant Row (Italian restaurant with a Jewish twist).
Lets be real, there was no way I was taking any form of public transportation with a day-long hangover, so I hopped in a cab and let it be my nap time.
I got there rather quickly considering I had to get across town at 6pm on a Friday.
“Left or right side?” The cab driver asked.
“Um, whatever side is good.” (I had no idea where I was going)
I find the restaurant after a few wrong turns (I’m an idiot), and my mom and sister arrive shortly after.
The bread basket is placed in front us, and I could not have dug in faster.
“Can I get you anything to drink?”
Do I drink to help the hangover, or do I get something caffeinated so I wake up? ALCOHOL.
“Can I see your wine list?”
The waiter hands me the wine list, and I realize I know nothing about wine.
Without even opening up the menu I just ask, “What’s your lightest red wine by the glass?”
I don’t even hear his reply, “I’ll have that.”
My sister gets wine, and my mom gets a club soda (boo).
I see the menu has an artichoke appetizer, “Jewish style.” I had no idea there was Jewish way to cook artichokes, but my mom thinks it’s just the funniest, and orders them. I get a house salad, because I’m about to choke down black pasta with seafood as my main, so better to save my appetite.
My sister gets a caprese salad, and rolled pasta. My mom wants the same dish as me, but she’s allergic to tomatoes (every meal she tells the waiter, “I’m HIGHLY allergic to tomatoes.” She breaks out in hives. It’s annoying, but sometimes really funny to watch her freak out).
Since the black pasta comes with tomato sauce, it makes sense for her to order something else, so she begrudgingly orders the veal. I weirdly do not have one of those moms that tells me to order the fish.
“I miss tomatoes.” (she acquired the allergy with age)
“We know mom!”
Appetizers come, and we quickly distribute little bites to each other of our dishes.
“What’s this play about anyway.”
“I don’t know.”
“I don’t know.”
I whip out my phone and look up a brief description of the play.
“The mozzarella cheese is melted. Yes!”
“Can we get pepper please?”
My house salad was just lettuce, but I ate it like my life depended on it. The mains arrive super fast.
“They must be used to having people run to the theatre afterwards,” says my mom.
“Makes sense.”
“Well, we have a lot of time, so let’s eat slowly,” (good one).
My spaghetti was sort of simple, but my mom’s veal was stuffed with cheese, and that was a great surprise. My sister had pasta with ricotta cheese and tomato sauce, so there was no way she wasn’t finishing that.
“I don’t even care. I drank last night, and my diet restarts tomorrow,” I announce.
Our plates are cleared, “do you want the dessert menu?”
DUH.
“Can I get a cappuccino with skim milk?” My sister asks. Yep, the skim milk will totally save you from what you just ate.
“We only have whole milk.”
“Ok, I’ll still get it.” (you can’t deter us)
Napoleon ordered as well.
I then forklift myself up and trek to the theatre. When we arrive, the cast is singing on stage while people are being seated.
“Theatre people are so weird.”
“I know.”
Lattanzi (Mozzarella E Pomodoro: homemade mozzarella and fresh tomato with extra virgin olive oil and basil)
Surprise surprise, they melted the cheese a bit! The tomatoes were plump and not too mushy, too bad my mom couldn’t have any of it.
Lattanzi (arciofi Alia Giudia our signature dish of artichokes cooked jewish style; sauteed with garlic and olive oil)
If you like artichokes it’s a great app. Enough said.
Lattanazi (Insalata Mista mixed greens with endive and radicchio in a house vinaigrette dressing)
Your basic house salad. I ate it to hold me over so I wouldn’t keep eating the bread basket.
Lattanzi (veal stuffed with cheese and a side of roasted vegetables)
This was a special so I don’t have the fancy pants title of this dish. However, I really liked it. Maybe it’s because I try to not eat red meat, so when I do it’s super exciting, but it was a solid dish.
Lattanzi (black spaghetti in a spicy tomato sauce with seafood)
I would have liked a little more heat to the dish, but if you have a sensitive palette this is a good dish to order.
Lattanzi (Rotolo Di Spinaci E Ricotta: homemade rolled pasta filled with ricotta cheese and spinach topped with tomato sauce)
If you’re going to splurge on a serious pasta dish, this is a good one to do it with. I’d say the portion is equivalent to two giantic pasta shells.
Lattanzi (napoleon)
So.good. I’m a sucker for napoleons, so it was a great way to end the meal.
I just want to apologize to my “many” followers aka my cousins and like 2 friends who read this for not posting that much lately. I’ve been trying to shrink my hips and butt for summer, and that means no eating out for extravagant 3 course meals. Weird, I know.
Instead of posting my incredibly entertaining stories, I have been posting links to food articles I like. As my cousin so nicely pointed out, “I can just look these articles up myself,” I am still posting another link.
I like to think of myself as your personal food filter for note worthy articles. (She also politely told me that I need to check out a map since I rarely take the subway or bus…deal with it)
So I promise to fatten up soon and go out to dinner, in the meanwhile [Click the photo above to read, What’s on Your NYC Bucket List?]
Kin Shop [Click the photo above to go to Kinshop’s website]
469 6th Avenue (between 11th and 12th Street) New York, NY 10011
It was my birthday this past weekend, and I managed to squeeze 5 meals out of it (I know what was I thinking?). I decided to not blog my meals so I could be “present” (I don’t know), but by meal # 5 I figured it was time to get back into it.
My last and final birthday meal was at Kinshop with my two girl friends who…like to eat (I am never allowed to tag them in these posts, because I write things like that).
I was just a fatty all day, and wanted to stay healthy for dinner, which I mean, we all know was pretty unlikely. My friends had also had “fat days” (I ate this at 11, then this, then this, then is…is that bad? Are we Judy from SNL?), so we were all thrilled that we were on the same page for dinner.
“Wait, you want to be healthy too?”
(I feel like we were happy, but also disappointed that there was no one to push us to get noodles)
“Your lipgloss looks great! Did you wear it for us?”
(Did I? I flash back to me putting it on, did I do it for them?? I don’t know maybe)
“Yeah.”
Back to serious business: this menu. My friend kept going, “it’s light. It’s light Thai food.”
Reading the menu I was not exactly feeling it was light when everything came w something fried or meaty.
I only participated in the vegetable input. I felt overwhelmed.
The waiter comes over to take our order, and we begin.
“Whats the fluke like?”
“It’s sort of like sushi.”
“Ok, we’ll get that.”
“The shrimp.”
“How many for each of you?”
“How many do you recommend?”
“I’d say two each.” We should have gotten 3 each, healthy my ass.
Fluke down, shrimp down, bibb salad ordered, and stir fry vegetables with water chestnuts also added to the mix. What do we get next? This clearly is not enough.
My friend decides to include our waiter in our brainstorming, “We’re all sort of on a diet, so what do you recommend.”
He starts pointing towards the noodle section, and it was like in one ear, out the other.
We opt to order 2 soups to share between the 3 of us: tomato soup, and meatball soup.
As the waiter leaves, I notice he’s sort of cute (is he gay? Probably, I tend to like gay men for some reason, I’ll just keep this to myself)
“It’s going to be so awkward when the waiter sees us attacking our food after we told him we’re dieting.” Woops.
“What’s going on with your friend and that guy?”
“It’s over.”
“As soon as they became exclusive?”
“Yep, she let her freak flag fly way too soon after getting the exclusive title.”
“Big mistake.”
“Totally, you need to wait until you know they love you before they know how nuts we are.” True that.
Fluke comes! It is served on these funky leaves that I proclaimed were “fuzzy,” and my other friend identified as “cilantro like.” It had nice flavor, but we all agreed they need to make it more lettuce wrap like.
“It needs a different leaf.”
Bibb salad is placed in front of us. Bibb lettuce is fun, because the leaves are huge and buttery, but it’s sort of hard to serve and eat. It was really yummy though, and I loved that it was served with plums and pumpkin seeds. Great combo.
“Is that a gel manicure?”
“Yes, do I need to get it redone?”
“No, it looks great. It doesn’t look like you got it yesterday, but it looks good!”
“Okay good, I don’t want to get it done again.”
“I don’t like mine.”
My other friend throws her hands in front of us and goes “Look at mine!”
She got a new greyish purple (I feel like she’s going to read this and tell me that was not the color so sorry in advance!) and she was wiggling her fingers in the hopes to get some attention on them.
Shrimp arrives. Spicy with a peanut-ish sauce on the side. I use the word ish, because if it’s not what it really is than I feel bad. It was delic, but my friend sucked the head off one and told us it was great, and my head was empty, so that was disappointing. We only ordered 6, and they only had 5 left! For G-d’s sake I wanted every bite to count.
Soup comes, I tried to avoid the meatballs (Skinny Bitch remember), and failed per usual, I’d like to say it was worth it. Tomato soup was thicker than I thought it was going to be. Good, but I thought it would be on the healthier side.
As we’re finishing up, all of our phones are on the table, and I can see one friend texting the other, I’m like “OH MY GD THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT ME.” They were, but only because they wanted to get me a candle 🙂 Sweet right?
By the end of the meal I had drank a lot of water (food was spicy!), and had to use the restroom, which was of course downstairs (stop it NY with that), and as I was strutting up the steps to get back to my table I see the waiter at the top of the staircase, and I trip. Yes, I tripped.
“Happy birthday!” he says.
“Thanks.” Definitely gay.
Kin Shop (bibb salad: plum, toasted sunflower seeds & pickled mustard seed vinagrette)
I weirdly love seeds, and mustard seeds are very strong in flavor, and plums are sweet, so I was into this.
Kin Shop (miang of fluke: lycheese, shiso leaves, chili jam & fried garlic)
Pretty right? Nice little bites, but fuzzy, so a little weird.
Kin Shop (stir fry of aquatic vegetables: water spinach, water chestnuts & watercress)
I actually forgot to take a picture of this, because I ate it VERY fast. So, don’t hate, I stole this pic. I would say this dish tasted most like classic Chinese food in a brown sauce: that’s the only way I can think of to describe it.
Kin Shop (house speciality: grilled prawns with fresh lime & phuket style” black pepper sauce.
I want to label this as clean flavors. My friend got a really spicy bite though and sorta freaked out.
Kin Shop (steamed pork meatball soup: crispy garlic, bok chyshoots & black soy sauce)
I was apprehensive about this, because I thought it would be too salty, but it wasn’t! You can also see the steam of how hot it came out. It was one of the only dishes we ordered that wasn’t spicy, so it complimented everything well.
Kin Shop (garam Masala & tomato soup: tofu, mung beans & holy basil)
You can see how creamy it is from the picture, but it taste solid, and it has a little kick.
The Kardashians just had a little din at one of my favorite restaurants, Valbella’s, and they better back off my spot! It’s mine, you guys take everything else! (Fine Kim, I like your shoes)
[Click the photo above to go to Valbella’s website]
Kutsher’s [Click the photo above to go to Kutsher’s website]
186 Franklin Street, New York, NY 10013
My pops offered to take me out to din and I obliged. I usually pick a spot in my neighborhood, but it’s the Tribeca Film Festival baby, lets pretend we’re celebrities and hang in TriBeCa instead, duh!
Made a rezie at Kutshers at 7:30 on Thirsty Thursday. My dad was pickin’ me up so I had no fears of catching a cab or finding my way downtown…I have NO sense of direction.
He told me he would get me at 7, but that old man was early for the first time eva, and I had to run around like a chicken without a head, trying to find pants with some give in them. I found a pair of wide-leg jeans, and hopped in the elevator.
We were zipping along downtown, as I told my dad my thoughts on dieting, what I try not to eat, what I want to eat, what I can’t eat, where I should work out (“I just need to eat in moderation, that’s all,” said the food blogger).
“Or you could just get mono again and lose the weight,” my dad says as he navigates away from a cab.
…thanks Dad.
Everything was going fine and dandy until we hit Broome Street. GRID LOCK TRAFFIC. Nowhere to go. It was torture. All my great conversation pieces were being used up in the frontseat of the car.
“I’m starving!” my dad screams in the car (So that’s who I get it from).
Fortunately for us, there was a hotdog stand right outside our car. My dad pulls down his window, “Hey! Let me get a hotdog with sauerkraut and mustard.”
I had been preaching to him for the past 20 minutes the problems with our meat industry, because I am currently reading Skinny Bitch in the hopes I’ll become anorexic and not care about food, so I held back from ordering my very own hotdog (I had a bite).
“How ya gonna give up meat? It’s just too good,” my dad says as he takes down the hotdog.
We finally arrive at Kutshers, and we are seated at the modern Jewish eatery. What to get, what to get…
“Check out these cocktails!” My dad hits the menu to show me where to look. (he’s a big tapper when he talks… “you see the thing is…” tap tap tap)
If you went to Jew camp as my Dad and I did, you could appreciate a few: Bug Juice, Route 17, Café Canteen, The Anawana…you get the idea.
Ok, screw the drinks. I don’t need to waste my calories, what are we ordering??
We stare at the pair eating next to us, two guys with meat dishes (that sounds weird, sorry I thought it, you thought it, done). I peak over and immediately declare it’s the flanken short ribs. No doubt in my mind.
Appetizers….
“We gotta get the meatballs,” my dad says as his pointer underlines the description on the menu.
“Ok, Dad fine, but I want the potato latkes.”
The waiter suggest the charcuterie, but my dad is like hell to the no. I just kept saying, “I did hear they’re known for their char-coot-er-ie.”
We also got crispy artichokes, because why not?
Mains? Should we share? I’m pretending to be a vegetarian (remember when we ordered meatballs?), so I got the kreplach, which is pretty much ravioli, whoops, and OF COURSE my dad went for the short ribs: we’ll share. Oh, and brussels sprouts, we love brussel sprouts.
“You ever been on JDate,” my dad starts.
“No, Dad.”
“You know a lot of people on it?”
“I know people that are on it, and people that are not on it.”
“You dating anyone?” (hint hint hint hint)
Apps are yum, yeah I ate the meatballs, and they were good, so what.ev.er. The latkes were good, but not as good as my mom’s (are you reading this Mom?).
I’m starting to crack under this pressure. I need to contract mono and go on Jdate. Noted. Suddenly it’s just too much for me to bear…”It’s just so hard! I really didn’t picture myself at 25 (not 25 yet, a week away) at this job, in this apartment!”
“You just want a boyfriend.” THANKS DAD!
The waiter must have felt the pressure as well, because when he went to pick up the pitcher of water it slipped out of his hands and spilled everywhere. The kreplach was yummy with mushrooms and nuts. My dad put a small chunk of meat on my plate, as I ate the mashed potatoes directly off his plate.
“What’s your sister been up to? Who did she take to formal?”
“Show me a picture.”
“His hair was gel’d, it looks gray on Facebook.”
“Let me see.”
Dessert time. I wanted to get the ice cream sandwich, but the waiter steered us towards the chocolate cake…it was ok.
“Being sick sucks!” my dad exclaims to me. He just had strep throat, and if you spoke to him you’d think he was on his deathbed.
“You’re just being a guy.”
“I lost 5lbs from just eating soup and tea.” Ok, maybe you’re not being a guy.
We finish eating our 8 course meal…”how many people do you think are Jewish in here?” A good amount.
As he drives me back to my apt, he makes a wrong turn, and we end up going on a bridge to Brooklyn… “well, I don’t know the last time you were on the Manhattan Bridge, but you’re on it now,” he says. I see where my sense of direction comes from.
Kutsher’s (bread)
The bread was challah, and it was good! I’m down with this theme.
Kutsher’s (Milton short ribs and brisket meatballs)
Really yummy. It’s like a mini Jewish holiday meal.
Kutsher’s (potato latkes)
Solid. They don’t taste like my mama’s, but I’m still happy we got them.
Kutsher’s (pan roasted brussels sprouts)
We ordered too much, and didn’t really touch them, so leftova for me!
Kutsher’s (red wine braised flanken style short ribs)
Short ribs, mashed potatoes. It’s meat and potatoes. It’s what you think it is. It’s good and unhealthy.
Kutsher’s (wild mushroom and fresh ricotta kreplach)
So I ordered pasta, judge me. fine! Skinny bitch said it’s ok, sorta. I didn’t finish it, and I am sticking to it. 2 pieces of kreplach aren’t going straight to my ass (who am I trying to convince?)
Kutsher’s (seven layer’s devil food cake)
Cake was ok, I declared that they need a chocolate meltaway on the menu…you’re welcome for that suggestion.
Boqueria [Click the photo above to go to Boqueria’s website]
53 west 19th street (between 5th and 6th Ave) New York, NY 10011
After fully gorging myself from a holiday weekend, I decided to continue this path of destruction by going out to dinner with two friends.
I had just seen American Reunion (it’s what you would expect), and we decided to keep the momentum going by walking to a place nearby for an early dinner. Only two of us went to the movies, so the other one met us at the restaurant. In the interim we decided to grab a drink. While drinking, we decided it would be a great idea to get another drink at dinner. What planning!
We’re idiots and decided to eat “light” by going to Boqueria for tapas (light, I’m sure). We were trying to keep kosher for Passover, so NO bread! How bad could we possibly eat?
The two of us walk into the restaurant, and it’s pretty empty. I would say it’s a surprise, but most people don’t eat dinner at 6pm on a Sunday (or ever).
“3 please.”
The hostess looks around the restaurant like it’s packed to the gills and responds, “Sure, just let me know when your other person is here.”
Yes, because people are climbing over each other to get a seat. Let’s definitely make us wait in the front. Our friend arrives with ballet flats on and announces her foot keeps cramping up, “I hate when that happens.”
The hostess then seats us at a communal table. There are 3 of us, and no one is in the restaurant. Lets seat us at our own table. I know you don’t know us, but you don’t want us near the other guests.
As soon we sit down, my friend goes, “I want the spinach. I want the mackerel. I definitely want the steak. We need to get steak.”
“Ok.”
“Ok.”
It’s tapas so the menu isn’t that extensive, but we are really diving in.
“I want the patatas bravas. If you guys don’t want them, I still have to have them.” Wow, easy killer. Who said we couldn’t get them (they fit the Passover bill)? I picture her with this plate in front of her never coming up for air.
“I love those. Definitely!” I say.
Then little Miss Spinach goes, “There are four things, we definitely need to get. The rest I don’t care.” FOUR THINGS?? Most people put in a two dish request, she puts in for four, and they’re all mandatory.
They were: the spinach, the hanger steak, the shrimp, and the lamb meatballs.
I wasn’t opposed to any of this, so those were put on our definite lists.
I threw out the bacon wrapped dates. Bacon is kosher for Passover!
Miss Patatas Bravas overlapped with Miss Spinach on the meatballs on her top 5 list, so we were good to go.
The waitress comes over, “Can I get you guys something to drink?”
Sangria! Ay ay ay ay!
This poor waitress. She was on the quiet side, and we’re just not on the quiet side.
Time to order. After feeling like we had gone overboard I ask the waitress, “is this too much?”
She shockingly comes back with, “I would get one more if I were you.” Ok, wow! We decide we can just order another dish as we move along, to see how hungry we are.
We all dive into to each dish as they are served somewhat staggered. Stuffed dates first, amazing, but there are only three. Biotch please.
Then spinach and potatoes.
“My type is Michael Cera.”
“Really? I don’t know one person you have dated or hooked up with that remotely resembles Michael Cera.”
“Yeah, like cool but a little dorky, but not dorky and kinda cool.”
I continue attacking the patatas bravas.
“No one else is eating this.”
“Are you kidding? I am too!”
Then comes meatballs and hanger steak. Both great!
“What is that with the steak?”
“I think it’s squash.”
“Squash.”
“I like squash.”
…
“Which movie did you like better, 21 Jump Street or American Reunion?”
“I haven’t seen 21 Jump Street yet.”
“It’s hysterical!”
Check magically appears and we realize we never ordered a sixth dish. UH OH.
“Let’s get Tasti.”
“Great idea.”
Boqueria (red sangria)
Great! Picked some of the fruit out and nibbled on it…in public.
Boqueria (datiles con beicon)
Dates stuffed with almonds and Valdeon, wrapped in bacon.
It was a blessing and a curse that there were only 3 of these. I could have eaten ten more!
Boqueria (espinacas a la Catalana)
Sauteed spinach, garbanzos, pine nuts, garlic, raisins.
Just because it’s green doesn’t mean it’s great for you. Smothered in oil, it was yummy and sweet, but who cares? I kept Passover.
Boqueria (patatas bravas)
Crispy potatoes, salsa grava, roasted garlic allioli
Crispy potatoes with a garlic sauce on top and a red sauce at the bottom to shmush (that is a big girl word) the potatoes in at the bottom? It’s never a bad idea.
Boqueria (gambas al ajillo)
Shrimp, garlic and Guindilla pepper in olive oil.
It tasted like it was doused in butter and oil. Not to say that is bad, but don’t think you’re being healthy by ordering shrimp. Lies! All lies!
Boqueria (albondigas)
Lamb meatballs, tomato sauce, sheep’s milk cheese.
I don’t know if I’m one to judge what is deemed light, and what is deemed heavy, but I’d venture to say that for meatballs, it tasted light, and didn’t make you feel weighed down afterwards.
City Grit [Click the photo above to go to City Grit’s website]
38 Prince Street (between Mott and Mulberry) New York, NY 10012
After hearing about the wonderful concept of New York culinary salon, City Grit, I decided I just HAD to try this out!! I don’t want to butcher the explanation of what City Grit is so I would just click on the link if I were you, but I will try anyway. Pretty much, this little lady named Sarah Simmons hosts different food events in a space in Soho. They host about 15 events per month, and each one is a multi-course meal with a theme. Each dinner is completely different from the one before. Sometimes they have guest chefs, but mostly Sarah runs the show.
Anywho, back to me! After e-mailing my fake boyfriend aka gay best friend about this, he wrote me an e-mail saying he wanted to go to an event called “Best of the Best” for a mutual friend’s birthday, and asked if I wanted to go (it was my idea, don’t even think about claiming it). I bought my ticket (it was $60 for a 5 course meal, alcohol not included), and decided to be shmoozy and e-mail the host, Sarah Simmons, for a sneak peak of the menu. She obliged, and swore me to secrecy. I was thrilled to know more than my friends so I didn’t tell them anything.
As the day approached, I wanted a plan for the night. Did I need to print a ticket out for this? (You don’t.) Where was I meeting them? (It was my gay bff, the birthday girl and her boyfriend.) My best friend may be gay, but he’s a dude, which means his planning skills are minimal at best (he didn’t make reservations for his boyfriend’s birthday until the day of his birthday… SUCH A BOY).
I gchat the birthday girl asking what the deal is (she usually knows what’s up, and I felt like I could trust her game plan). Turns out, it was a surprise…woops. You would THINK that my friend would include that in the e-mail, but no, he did not. Like I said HORRIBLE PLANNER.
The birthday girl and I conspired to not tell him the surprise was ruined (so if you are reading this, you already know, the house has been boarded up and we are staying at the Holiday Inn). P.S. it’s your own fault.
I meet them outside their apt (they all live together. Three’s Company, hit it!), and as soon as I arrive I announce, “Let’s go I’m starving!”
Mr. Horrible Planner gives me a crazy look and goes, “It’s a surprise!”
“It’s a surprise we’re eating? It’s almost 7:30. This is a surprise to no one.” (Isn’t he so annoying?)
So, we arrive, and if the birthday girl really didn’t know where we were going, she actually WOULD be surprised, because the outside of the building says, “Furniture Shop.” They are so tricky (think speakeasy sorta), and a sign was written on the door that said, “we will be right back.” Ok….
“Are you going to tell her yet?”
“Badaya.” (that is a made up word that he kept saying over and over again on the way to dinner)
“Ok, well we’re here, so maybe it’s time.” (Am I a crazy actress? I might be).
We only waited a few minutes until they opened the doors for us. You walk in, give your name, and then they seat you in assigned seating, (it’s assigned by group, so my friend called ahead of time to say that I was with them, because we didn’t sign up together so keep that in mind if you go!).
The space is kitschy. It is an old Catholic School turned into I guess a culinary salon, so do what you want with that knowledge, but the bathrooms are far away with low toilets (it was an elementary school). Also, they made it unisex. It wasn’t so bad, but it wasn’t the highlight of the event. I digress…Guests sit in two rooms with long tables scattered throughout, dim lighting, dark wood, and “Western” accents. It’s definitely not a sexy vibe, but it’s fun!!
“Are all events held in this space?”
“Yes, I think so,” I reply.
“No, they change it,” responds Mr. Horrible Planner.
Disagreement. I looked up other events, and I know they are all held on Prince Street.
“No, they’re all here.”
“I think they change it.”
“I think you’re wrong.”
The menu is posted on a blackboard, but I had it in my hands on my IPhone (I win).
“Does anyone want to read the menu?” I point to my phone.
“I’ll take a look at it,” says birthday girl.
“It’s on the blackboard,” responds Mr. Horrible Planner. (Ok, squint at the blackboard butthead…someone doesn’t want to give me any credit)
I glare at my best friend turned arched nemesis and am about to make a scene at our table, when our waiter comes over to save the day. He introduces himself as Dan Brown (he did not write the DaVinci Code, and it took a lot for me to NOT make that horrible joke at the table), and lets us know our wine options. I am allergic to white wine (if I’m ok with this you can be too) so we decid to share a bottle of red between the four of us, it eventually turned into 3 bottles…woopsies!
First, we are served with an amuse bouche of a fried oyster wonton with spicy mayo (are you salivating?). I know an amuse is just supposed to be one bite, but I was starving! KEEP IT COMING!!
I was really feeling the wine by the first course (shocker), which was a seared scallop, another baby plate. I get it. I get it. It’s a progression, but my stomach really didn’t give a flying…
As the first course was being distributed to the last few people, Sarah and her business partner spoke, giving some background on City Grit (p.s. her partner said all events are held in the same space, booyah!), and then a description of our meal. Sarah said the meal were the top dishes of their past events, so rock on! She was just so cute. She’s from the south, and while I usually despise anyone using the word ya’ll she made it sound so endearing! Let’s be friends Sarah!
However, that doesn’t mean I withheld all judgment (puh-lease)! When describing the third course, a fried chicken biscuit with deviled egg, she said…
“A friend once told me, a dinner with deviled eggs, is better than a dinner without deviled eggs,” laughter ensues, and then she goes, “And I couldn’t agree with him.” Period.
Couldn’t agree with him more Sarah. You forgot the word more. You just changed the meaning of that sentence.
“I said more in my head.”
“Me too!”
“That’s like when people say, “I could care less.” It’s “I couldn’t care less.”
“I don’t know which one I say…”
I hope the people next to us were not listening to our conversation.
The 2nd course was gumbo, a bigger portion score! Then came the chicken course, which tasted just like a gourmet McDonalds chicken filet, but with a twist. I tried to eat it slowly, because I wanted my last bite to include the biscuit, but it was just so hard!
Since the space is two rooms it takes some time for the servers to distribute all the plates to each table, so there is quite a bit of time between each course. We were over two hours in with two more courses to go!
“You had a weird friend at your birthday party.”
“What did he do?”
“We were in the elevator and he said everyone in the elevator had matching jackets on.”
“Did you?”
“Nope, they were all different colors! And when we pointed it out he said, “That’s such a Samantha thing to say.”
“I think he was in a weird mood that night…”
Fourth course! Boneless short ribs with paramesan cream grits and braised collareds. It was our biggest portion yet. Suddenly I was full, and I couldn’t finish the plate. I became a new woman.
“I get the progression now. Makes total sense.”
“Yeah, it’s perfect.”
Amazing how easily one’s mind changes when they’re full.
My friend was scraping the parmesan up with his utensils, and I started to gag watching him use his fork and knife so intently just for a tiny puddle of cheese. I was definitely satiated.
I tried to not look at him, “I got a gel manicure for the holidays!” as I wiggle my fingers jazz hands style.
“Why?”
“So it stays!”
“Do I look like Barbie?” My nails are currently bright pink. The lady applying my gels asked if I was going away, they are just THAT tropical looking…
Dessert!! Banana pudding with salted Caramel. I am not the biggest of banana cream pie, and that’s pretty much what it was, but in a jar. However our awesome waiter, Dan Brown, brought out one with a candle.
Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday to you.
Hap-py birth-day dear ___ (silence in the Catholic schoolhouse as the patrons wait to hear her name, and then when we say it, everyone laughs like they knew the whole time)
Happy birthday to you!
Big tip for Dan Brown.
As we were leaving…
“Hey what was that word I kept saying on the way here?”
“Badaya.”
“Oh, yeah”
“Ba-dayeinu”
Happy Passover/Easter everyone!
City Grit (menu, Best of the Best)
Here is the menu of the 5 course delight!
City Grit (fried oyster wonton with spicy mayo, kimchi, ginger scallion sauce)
This was described as Asian food with southern ingredients. I would have eaten 10 more fried oysters. Great way to start off the meal!
City Grit (seared scallop with harissa carrot puree, bacon marmalade)
Smiley Face!! Bacon marmalade, need I say more?? This was my probably my favorite, and it was just so teeny tiny. I wanted more!
City Grit (Gumbo Z Herbes: green gumbo with white rice grits, pickled ramps)
I know this looks gross, but it was not! It was very hearty!
Sarah also told a great story about how this specific gumbo recipe is one of the oldest gumbo recipes and was almost extinct, but was revived after Hurricane Katrina, when people would make large pots of this dish to survivors of Katrina’s aftermath)
City Grit (Chicken & Egg: fried chicken biscuit with deviled eggs, shaved celery salad)
I loved this! Classy fried food is where it is at.
City Grit (boneless short ribs with parmesan cream grits, braised collards)
This was definitely the biggest portion we received all night. It was a little chewy at first, but once you dug into the middle it melted in your mouth!
City Grit (banana pudding with salted caramel)
Not my favorite part of the meal, but if you like banana flavored dessert then you’re in the clear! Please not the Christmas themed birthday candle!
Mono + Mono [Click the photo above to go to Mono + Mono’s website]
116 E 4th St (between 1st and 2nd Ave), New York, NY 10003
Girl birthday dinners…too many girls, too many opinions: Is this funny? What do we order? Is this insulting? Can I taste that? Am I being left out? Did we just get deep? Should we order drinks? Fun, but oh em effing gee!
This one started out reg, with an email invite for seven of our closest friends to Mono + Mono either Tues or Wednesday. Perk of a birthday dinner is you don’t spend 30 e-mails fighting over what restaurant to go to (or at least that happens with my friends: I don’t like that place, that’s too far, the food looks weird, it’s too much money, I want byob…is your head spinning?). But Tuesday or Wednesday was like its own ticking time bomb…
“I don’t care, up to you.”
“Whatever works”
“I’m down for whatever”
The email chain continues with different ways of trying to convey that each girl is “go with the flow and fine with whatever,” until the opinionated one of the group is like WEDNESDAY! Ok fine, no one wanted to make a decision anyway.
7:30 dinner gives me just enough time to turn into a human being post work. We arrive, and the host greets us suggesting we hang up our coats, because in his exact words, “it’s a stove back there.” (a stove? Maybe an oven? I immediately think of Bridesmaid’s…What kind of name is stove?”)
Only 3 out of 7 have arrived, and I have to tell you, I’m starving. I already looked up the restaurant ahead of time (I mean who doesn’t??), but the menu was overwhelming me nonetheless. Mono + Mono specializes in their fried chicken, and their Soju (Soju is Korean alcohol, but I would say it pretty much tastes like vodka infused with fruit) so in my mind those were definites.
Eventually the others arrive, and we can get down to business, but not before my friend arrives, plops down in her seat, and announces she “loves getting spit in the face at work” (she’s a middle school teacher in the Bronx, so a student spit at her). What.an.intro. Dinner is about to go down…
“Are we sharing?”
“Lets share.”
“Yeah, lets share.”
….
“I want the chicken.”
“Ok, what chicken should we get?”
“I want fries too.”
“I don’t eat chicken, but I’m just going to get something else.” (what?)
So far we have 2 large plates of fried chicken (1 soy garlic, and 1 hot & spicy) and one order of French fries after my friend boldly states that she “loves potatoes.” Yeah, ok, sure.
“The hot & spicy is pretty spicy”
“That’s ok, we like spicy,” says Miss Wednesday. Since I actually like spicy it was fine with me.
The waiter throws out that the chicken takes 40 minutes to prepare…wait what? Let’s get more food.
“Who wants sushi?”
“I’m fine with sushi.”
“We’re still getting the French fries right?”
“Yes.”
“How about the ninja roll?”
“Wait, are we getting French fries?”
….
“I want a salad, does anyone else want a salad?”
“if you want the salad, I’ll eat the salad.”
“Everyone will pick at it…”
Soju arrives first. All of us are handed small glasses with a large block of ice in the middle, and the Soju is poured on top of the ice cube. It is gone in a matter of minutes.
Food arrives staggered as we all grab at it with our forks, chopsticks, fingers, and whatever utensil we can find on the table.
“Who has seen Hunger Games?”
“I’m seeing it on Friday.”
“Did you read the book?”
“She definitely didn’t read it, she only saw the movie.” (she only saw the movie)
“I’m reading it now…”
“Who watches Shahs of Sunset?” This show is so bad it’s good, and I have verbal diarrhea going on and on about Resa (if you don’t know who that is, that’s just too bad for you)….Mob wives comes next…and then like any girl with a pulse, Fifty Shades of Grey comes up.
“It’s crazy.”
“I want to read it.”
“it’s on my kindle.”
“Is it a fetish? Like a baby?”
“Like the Nip/Tuck episode?”
“No, like S&M.”
So I guess this is my next book, I need to be able to keep up with the conversation, and I have to tell you it was difficult. Diagonal conversations, across the table conversation, adjacent conversation, my head was spinning. “What are you guys talking about over there?”
The fried chicken arrives. Each plate is half soy garlic and half hot & spicy. “Why didn’t they just put each on a different plate? That’s so dumb.” Whatevs lets eat. As it turns out, the waiter was not messing around, it was really spicy. You can’t tell the difference between each flavor chicken until you take a bite of it, so all hell broke loose.
We suddenly turn into rabid animals sniffing the chicken, biting the chicken, then putting it back. It was a scene. When it was all said and done, I have to say it was really good. Although everyone went nuts from the spicy, I would make the argument that the soy garlic might have been too sweet without the spicy chicken paired with it.
I sneak off to the bathroom, and request a candle and dessert for our birthday girl. Frozen yogurt! Yes! Tastes just like Pinkberry. As we’re winding down I see Miss Wednesday sucking the gigantic ice cube into her mouth, rolling it around, and then spitting it back into her glass…it’s time to go home.
Mono + Mono (grapefruit flavored Soju)
It’s alcohol. It’s fine with me.
Mono + Mono (mango salad)
A little creamy, but we each had a a bites, so great for a few bites, but definitely get it to share, not for yourself.
Mono + Mono (fries)
These were actually unreal! I “love potatoes” too. We ordered a second round of these. It came with 3 dipping sauces. One is a spicy mayo, which my friend almost spit out after already eating the spicy chicken (still funny).
Mono + Mono (spider roll)
Look at this monster! The pickiest eater of our friends decided it looked too good to not try, and surprise, she liked it! It’s deep fried and covered in sauce…puh-lease.
Mono + Mono (Ninja roll)
Looks cray right? We each got a roll or two depending on who didn’t want this particular dish. I definitely would get them to share, because they’re good for a taste, but not a whole meal.
Mono * Mono (fried chicken)
Here it is! Can you tell which one is spicy, and which one is sweet? I don’t care I’d eat them again just to watch everyone freak out.
GirlyFoodie 